Conflict Resolution Tip Sheet

Don't Allow Conflict Situations To Spread or Worsen

Our conflict resolution tip sheet is provided to you in an effort to assist leaders to peacefully and effectively resolving employee conflicts.

If you are having to deal with and/or manage other people, you will sooner or later have to deal with conflict situations.

Conflict is not inherently bad. In fact, conflict simply stems from differing viewpoints, which every good leader must learn to successfully address.

Since no two people view the world exactly the same way, disagreement is quite normal. Every competent adult needs to develop their conflict resolution skills in order to successfully navigate through life.

Consider the fact that anyone who agrees with you all of the time is probably telling you what you want to hear, not what he or she actually believes. Is that really what your want? Absolutely not!

The reason conflict is so readily avoided is because of the emotional risk that come along with it. When there is conflict, it means that there is strong disagreement between two or more individuals. The conflict is usually in relation to interests or ideas that are meaningful to one or both of the parties involved.

Conflict in the workplace that goes unmanaged can lead to poor performance, insubordination and even violence.

The key to managing conflict effectively is to learn the following key skills that are detailed in this conflict resolution tip sheet. With this important tool at your side, you are well on your way to becoming a good conflict resolution manager.

Examine the three main areas where conflict occurs:

In interpersonal one-on-one relationships
In meetings
In negotiations

Although there are similarities between all of these areas, each one is slightly different depending on the setting the conflict occurs in. Let's take a detailed look at each one in our conflict resolution tip sheet.

Conflicts In Interpersonal Relationships.

Sometimes in interpersonal relationships, such as those between you and one of your employees, there may be a conflict that you are not aware of.

If someone who is normally upbeat and friendly toward you suddenly begins avoiding you or being rude, there is usually a reason. If the person has remained cheerful with everyone else except you, chances are you are dealing with a conflict situation.

In these instances, you will want to address the problem by proceeding through the following conflict resolution tip sheet steps.

Try to determine if there is a problem between you and the other person.

If you think there is a problem, set up a private face-to-face meeting to discuss the problem with the other person.

In a non-confrontational manner, ask the person if there is a problem. If his/her answer is "No", inform the person that you think there is a problem and explain what you think the problem is.

As you talk, ask for feedback. Do not "attack" the other person with accusations.

Try to listen to each other with open minds.

Be sure to respect each other's opinions.

Take a few minutes to consider the other person's point of view.

Try to determine why the other person felt the way he did.

Avoid "finger-pointing." Stay focused on the facts rather than differences in personality

Try to work out a compromise that pleases both parties.

Conflicts In Meetings

Conflicts in meetings can be very disruptive, but they can also be very helpful.

Remember this conflict resolution tip; at the root conflicts are disagreements. If the person who is disagreeing with you is raising valid questions, it may benefit the group to address the issues that are being presenting.

In fact, by listening to a differing point of view, you may gain valuable insight into what is and what is not working within your organization. However, if the person continues past the point of disagreement to the point of disruption, specific steps should be taken.

Below is our conflict resolution tip sheet tactics that you can use for meetings that get out of control.

Find some "grain of truth" in the other person's position that you can build upon.

Identify areas of agreement in the two positions.

Defer the issue for a later time/date in order to give yourself time to thoughtfully consider it.

Ask to speak with the individual after the meeting or during a break in order to plan a follow up discussion.

See if someone else in the meeting has a response or recommendation.

Present your view about proper timing, but do not force agreement. Let things be and go on to the next topic.

Acknowledge that the person may very well have a valid point and there may be some way to make the situation work for both parties.

Create an opening for the potential of a future compromise.

Conflicts In Negotiations

When you are negotiating with your clients, vendors, or even your employees, it is important to always keep in mind the idea that both parties are seeking a win/win resolution.

No one wants to feel like they are giving away something for nothing. In fact, most conflicts arise because one party feels like the other party is taking advantage of them.

In order to avoid these types of situations, there are certain conflict resolution tip principles you can apply to increase your chances of a successful negotiation.

Avoid defend-attack interaction: this is non-productive every time!

Seek more information: ask a lot of questions!

Check your understanding of the situation and summarize; be clear on the details of the conflict!

Try to understand the other person's perspective: communication is more than just listening; try to see it their way to the extent you are able.

Rules For Disagreeing Diplomatically

Regardless of the type of conflict you are dealing with, there are several conflict resolution tip best practices, or "rules-of-thumb" you should follow whenever you are trying to bring harmony to a volatile situation. Here they are:

Reflect your understanding of the other's position or opinion. "I feel, think, want, etc." This says, "I am listening to your opinion and I will take your opinion into account before making a final decision."

Let the other person know that you value her as a person even though her opinion is different from yours. "I understand (appreciate, respect, see how you feel that way, etc.)". This says to her, "I hear you and respect your opinion."

State your position or opinion. "I feel, think, want, etc." This says, "I don't agree, but I value you - so let's exchange ideas comfortably, not as a contest for superiority."

Becoming a good conflict resolution manager requires a lot of practice. Just keep this conflict resolution tip sheet nearby to help you stay focused on how to deal with conflicts thoughtfully and effectively.

Remember that the goal is to reach a compromise that both parties can live with as well as be happy with.

In other words, find a way that both of you can walk away feeling like a winner!

Team Building Tools & Resources

Our team building articles provide great team building ideas and teamwork games that a leader can leverage to ensure positive team moral and increased production. You can also Utilize our entire library of free leadership and team building tools to grow your business to new heights! Download our free team building tools for the purpose of leading your team to greater results and improved profitability.